NO THANKS, I DON'T NEED HELP!

How often have you said that to someone? Why do we think we can do everything on our own? Do we like to offer help - yes, I believe most of us do. Then we certainly should allow others to help us. It is incredibly selfish to give but not let others give back to us.

Is that an audacious statement to make? Maybe. Why is it selfish? That's easy - when we give (help others) we feel good about ourselves, and we like the accolades. We receive a blessing. However, being on the receiving end is very different. Do we feel weak? Do we not want to bother people? Do we not want to feel indebted? I believe the answer to these questions is yes for most of us.

This query became very personal for me recently. This Friday, October 2, I am having surgery, a torn rotator cuff. It happened from everyday living, aging and sports. Several people have asked if they could help. My brother also offered to help. He and Jo would come down and stay with me and do whatever I need. Guess what I said? No thanks, I don't think I will need any help. Then I started thinking about it. Maybe I will need help. Regardless, I should let them come down and stay with me, the company would be nice. But more importantly I would be giving them a blessing.

This next month of October I will be putting that into practice. Many people have asked if they can bring meals to me, and you now know what I told all of them! But now I have changed my mind. I will let them bring me some meals, drive me places, and visit with me. There will be times where I may feel a little uncomfortable, and that is called personal growth, and grace. Years ago I learned to say "thank you" when given a compliment. It's similar to allowing someone to help - simply and graciously say thank you.

Not being able to use my right arm, especially being right handed, will be difficult. The simplest of tasks will be difficult, if not impossible to do. I won't be driving for at least 2-3 weeks while my arm is in a sling, and certainly not while I am on pain meds. However, I have been practicing driving with one arm, at least in my community. But I won't do that on a freeway, too many things can go wrong where you need both strong arms. Today I even put my make-up on left-handed. It took twice as long, but women are very resourceful, especially when it comes to make-up and hair. Practicing helps me be ready for the unknown.

Thank you, good night and God Bless!    Aleta

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go."  Hermann Hesse -Poet and Novelist