AUTHENTICITY

It took me many years to learn how important authenticity was to my self-worth. Life is about making mistakes and learning from them. I once read, if you say something you wish you could take back, it would be like going to the top of a mountain and emptying a down feather pillow, and then trying to pick every one of them up. That's quite an emotional word picture.

It was about fifteen years ago I learned the word authentic, in terms of my growth. A friend gave me a wonderful book, Simple Abundance, by Sarah Ban Breathnache. The sub-title 'A Daybook of Comfort and Joy'. I will often quote her. I looked up authenticity in dictionary.com (a favorite past time) and here is what I found:   authenticity: adj not false, genuine, having the origin supported by unquestionable evidence; reliable, trustworthy.

Most high school educated adults know what the word genuine means. But when talking about human beings, it has a much deeper meaning. Being authentic means being true to yourself, being the same person with your spouse, your boss, your children, the president of the United States, your ill tempered neighbor. Making conscious choices that are in line with your beliefs. We have to wake up each morning, look at ourselves in the mirror, and be happy with whom we are becoming - for some reason, unless we have a great professor in college who directs us to this introspection, many of us will not think about this until much later in life.

Why is authenticity and self-knowledge important to me? By the time I reached 30, I was tired of the role playing I was doing in my head. We have all done it - why did I say that, why didn't I just tell her I can't go, what did she mean by that, and if I had only said ..... blah, blah, blah! I was also tired of feeling badly, feeling guilty about saying no. I am a people pleaser, and that can make for a pretty miserable life if you let it get out of hand. I had to learn how to be assertive - polite, and smile, and yet get my feelings across. It was tough for me. But we are all in the same boat - we are all human beings with feelings, and weaknesses, and strengths, and we all make mistakes. On top of all that life is happening at warp speed - with stress, and health issues, and family stuff. It comes down to getting along with people - we have to learn to listen better and remember that maybe something awful just happened to them and that's why they responded that way. Learning to listen, and just be quiet and say something like - maybe this isn't a good time to go over this. My mother used to tell me "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all". That basically means be quiet, listen, and say very little.

Take 10 seconds of boldness each day, or each week, and do something out of your comfort zone, and see what happens. Obviously something that will benefit you and possibly others. Your heart may race, you may freak out and say you will never do that again, or you may get mad at me. That's okay, it won't be the first time someone got mad at me. But I guarantee you will feel better eventually and you will do it again. Getting out of our comfort zone never killed anyone, but it does help start the creativity flowing. When we feel strong and confident and can think clearly, we can do anything we set our minds to do. I would never have thought I could write to an audience. I used to worry too much about pleasing everyone. That is impossible of course.

I read that the average person uses less than 1% of her/his brain. What can we do today to change that?

Thank you and God Bless you!   Aleta

"It's a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it."
author - Somerset Maugham